I stop taking Paxil a month ago, I did have some withdrawal symptoms like nausea, dizziness, vertigo, mood swings. Most of those symptoms have stop after one month, but I still have vertigo and mood swings.

The vertigo doesn’t bothers me as much as the mood swings… I mean going from happiness to a sad stage is a very frustrating situation.  During my PMS! my Goodness, it is a roller coaster of emotion.

Why women have to go through so many things? I don’t think men have so many problems with their moods, they are angry, happy, sad; but we in the other hand have what is in between, angry-happiness, sadness-happiness, angry-sadness, etc. Sometimes we don’t even know what emotion we are feeling…

Men have to be very patient with women sometimes, how do they do it? if sometimes I can’t even stand myself.

I guess lowering the doses, helped me to stop taking paxil. After a month, sometimes before I go to bed I feel like I’m forgetting something, but then I remember ”hey I don’t have to take any pills again!!” I am Paxil Free ;-p

Have you heard the lyrics of the song When The Sand Runs Out by Rascal Fatts?

I’m gonna stop lookin’ back and start movin’ on
And learn how to face my fears

After I stop taking paxil three weeks ago, ghosts from my past are hunting me, making me feel sorry about myself and all the bad things that happened to me during the time I was on paxil. I know It was a hard time, but now I am out of it, but if I keep thinking about those bad memories I will throw myself back to the hole. It is not an easy thing to do…but, you have to Stop yourself from lookin’ back, I have to start movin’ on

Cause people do it everyday
Promise themselves they’re gonna change
I’ve been there, but I’m changin’ from the inside out

Everyday people are trying to be better, they are trying to change, we don’t realize that the root of all our problems is located inside us! if we want to change, we have to change our way of thinking and the way we look at situations around us. If you archive that, you will be able to say

That was then and this is now
I’m a new man, yeah, I’m a brand new man
And when they carve my stone they’ll write these words
“Here lies a man who lived life for all that its worth”

that was me but this is now,
I am a brand new girl who is learning to face her fears and movin’ on after paxil

Last Sunday, my last 5 paxil pills ended in the toilet… and with that action I started a new journey, which I want to call ” Paxil Free, The Withdrawals effect”

After 3 days of no paxil, I am starting to feel some withdrawal symptoms. This morning during breakfast I was thinking ” looks like I not going to have that many problems after all..” but, during the afternoon I started to feel a weird sensation in the back of my head… inside of my head… is right at the back of my brain. I really do not know how to explain it, what I know is not a headache, it’s not a migraine; it could be like the feeling you get when you eat something really cold. The sensation is just at the back, only at the back of my head. It is not in my neck.

I’m also having some nausea and vertigo. The vertigo is not a good thing to have, specially if you work at the 20th floor…. :-S

Also, I’m feeling really tired all the time.

The only advise I can give to myself is: take it easy, just handle one day at the time, rest honey… you need your rest.

finally I know what is going on with me. After 2 years an half,  I got and answer. I have been diagnosed with asperger’s syndrome.

Symptoms during childhood

Parents often first notice the symptoms of Asperger’s syndrome when their child starts preschool and begins to interact with other children. Children with Asperger’s syndrome may:

• Not pick up on social cues and may lack inborn social skills, such as being able to read others’ body language, start or maintain a conversation, and take turns talking.
• Dislike any changes in routines.
• Appear to lack empathy.
• Be unable to recognize subtle differences in speech tone, pitch, and accent that alter the meaning of others’ speech. Thus, your child may not understand a joke or may take a sarcastic comment literally. Likewise, his or her speech may be flat and difficult to understand because it lacks tone, pitch, and accent.
• Have a formal style of speaking that is advanced for his or her age. For example, the child may use the word “beckon” instead of “call” or the word “return” instead of “come back.”
• Avoid eye contact or stare at others.
• Have unusual facial expressions or postures.
• Be preoccupied with only one or few interests, which he or she may be very knowledgeable about. Many children with Asperger’s syndrome are overly interested in parts of a whole or in unusual activities, such as designing houses, drawing highly detailed scenes, or studying astronomy. They may show an unusual interest in certain topics such as snakes, names of stars, or dinosaurs.²

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